Keven Singing

January 16, 2012

The Misadventures of An Awkward Black Girl

January 16, 2012

Awkward, Strange and Embarrassing Things That Have Happened To This Chocolate Girl

January 16, 2012
Keven & Me
Awkward Black Girl
I'm Awkward and Black
Awkward Now
Awkward Then

So I’ve been on this health kick lately, working out eating better etc. (Well I guess more like one week). The bestie and I decided that there was no reason for Kelly Rowland and Toni Braxton to look so much better than we do while being decades older than we are. So anywho,  the other day I went out and brought some One A Day Women vitamins, I ate some yogurt and had coffee for breakfast and then I hobbled out in the freezing New York air, to ship a package to my cousin. After standing in line for about five minutes I began to sweat profusely and immediately I knew that something was not right. The poor man behind the counter asked me if I was alright, and before I could answer I had beelined to the garbage and was vomiting in it. ( No I’m not preg, it was the vitamin). Embarrassed does not even begin to cover it. (On the bright-side it was a fro day and not a wig day because that would have just been foul). This ridiculous experience reminded me of some other tragically embarrassing things that seem to only happen to me.

Flyy, But I would still like to have my boobies

That Awkward Moment When I Decide I’m A Gym Rat : Sophomore year of college, I was actually going to the gym on a regular basis for a few months. I noticed that some of the more fit people would run backward on the treadmill. I have no idea why I thought my uncoordinated behind could do something like that SMH. Anyways, I decided it was a bright idea for me to run backwards as well. Obviously I fell on my ass and I have not been back to the gym since.

That Awkward Moment When My School Deletes My Financial Aid My Final Semester of College:  Since my school is expensive and I’m poor, I have financial aid like most people who attend college these days. Last February like for the past few Februaries I filled out my FASFA, however, for whatever reason my daddy did not file his 2010 taxes until this past November (yes November 2011) and therefore when I went on Friday to fill out some paperwork all of my financial aid had been deleted and I suddenly owed my school $30,000 more then I intended. SMH story of my life. (Luckily I conned the people into fixing the issue).

That Awkward Moment When I Think It’s Wise To Online Date: At the beginning of last semester, I thought it was a good idea for me to online date. (This was one of the dumbest ideas I’ve ever had in this lifetime, but whatever at the time I thought it was ok). Anyway. I met this dude and we talked for like 3 weeks before we decided to meet up. …..yeah he stood me up …TWICE. Luckily I soon came to my senses and deleted the profile.

Those Awkward Black Girl Moments: Anytime I had to take out my weave or braids when I had roommates my first two years of college and they would just come in and stare at me awkwardly under the pretense of having a conversation.

Those Really Awkward Moments: Last summer while at work, I got really sick…..yeah um lets just say I went commando for the rest of the day.

Those Awkward Black RA Moments: On more then one occasion, I’ve gotten out of bed in the middle of the night to yell at my residents for being very loud. After screaming, I realized that they are all looking at me strangely because I had on my large pink sleep hair bonnet and no bra :/

Or When you do Love and Basketball as a dorm program and only one of the five Black people in the whole building come and you two watch it together and eat up enough snacks for twenty people

Those Awkward Natural Hair Moments: Sometimes I walk down the street and see sistas with Natural hair that looks dry, brittle and crazy and I ponder to myself, does my hair look like that? You’re hair should never look like a Brillo pad. Please seek Youtube for some advice on Natural Hair

EPIC!!!!!
Unfortunate, please get a comb, some coconut oil, something.

That Awkward Attraction To Chris Brown Moment: That moment when you realize you’re attracted to Chris Brown despite the fact that he has bleached blonde hair and he’s known to warm up wigs. SMH

He just looks good, idk y.

Anywhoo, these are just a few of the weird and tragic things that have happened to me in the past few years. There are many more that I shall carry with me to the grave, but I hope these made you laugh.

As my mama always said, when you know better, you do better

Mommy and Me

xxoxox Chocolate Girl In the City xoxoxoxoxoxx
Happy MLK Day 🙂

PS. Have you watched these ??!! If Not DO IT